Today is my first day in this parish. I have that butterfly stomach – will they like me? Am I where God wants me to be?

It reminds me of my first day in my first parish. I was in Cap Haitian, Haiti in the West Indies. I had just graduated from University and I wanted to serve people and God. I was young and idealistic and it was 1986 so Haiti was in the middle of a revolution.

I was a deacon in Holy Spirit Episcopal Church in Cap Haitian – the biggest church in the diocese – just like Good Shepherd is. I had been under house-arrest for two weeks - for my own protection - during the riots - and my first day out of my room was to go to church.

As the only Caucasian among 400 Haitians, I sort of stuck out. People stared. Children hid in the skirts of their mothers and snickered. Old, wise people smiled – but at what, I was unsure.

I wanted to make a good impression. I wanted my identity to be that of a "good minister." So I decided to make a splash by speaking to the people in their own language - when we passed the peace. I was fluent in French and had spent two weeks studying Creole. I knew that in Creole, the article went after the noun. So instead of saying la table ("the table") one would say Table la ("table the"). So I figured that when we say the peace and I move around greeting everyone for the first time, I would say "paix la" since I knew "Peace" in French is "la paix" ...so in Creole I figured "la paix" would become "paix la."

So for the 20 minutes during the passing of the peace, I shook hands and said, enthusiastically "paix la." to everyone.

Problem was...in Creole...."paila!" means "shut up!"

But here's the thing: I was there, I was there with them! With them in the middle of a war, with them and they loved me despite my being a complete moron. I was there. I was with them. I spent two years crying with them and hoping with them and working alongside them and eating with them and loving them and being loved by them. I was there. And being there is most of the work of life. And I think the ministry of priest is the same – it's the ministry of being with....

"But you....who do you say that I am?"

Jesus says: "But you....who do you say that I am?" And as He says it to the disciples he says it to you and to me. We come to church, we go home, we come back again but do we really stop and think "But who is Jesus?" "What is Jesus' identity?"

I guess we each have a different answer. Mine is that Jesus is the one who is with us. Jesus is the one who offers himself. God as the lamb. God as self-offering one.

Identity¹ is a strange word. On the one hand "identity" marks one as different. My identity versus your identity. We each have an identity.

But what is really weird is that the word "Identity" means "sameness." Its root word is the Latin "identitas" which means "sameness" which is how we get the word "identical."

My identity marks me as different from your identity. We often say of children "she is trying to find her identity" which is a natural, if messy, phase of human development. And now, as I stand here my identity is a bit strange to you – who is this "Charles"? What is he like? Is he dour or hysterical? Is he high church or Low Church? Is he kind or bitchy? What is Charles' identity?

***

Jesus, in today's gospel is trying to get the disciples –indeed all of us – to see and name who Jesus is. Just previous to the gospel, Jesus has fed the five thousand and it was headline news on everyone's lips. In those days, a man who could feed five thousand men and their 25 thousand family members in one sitting was a big deal. It would be like a man, coming to Nashua and feeding one third of the whole city's 86,000 population in one sitting. That would make the evening news! Just the gathering – let alone the meal! So the disciples were getting an ear-full about what people in the city were saying about Jesus. Meanwhile, Jesus could see that that one act had set his death in motion.

The Pharisees were blind with rage at being so profoundly upstaged by a simple, loving man who healed and fed people. Not a man with labels the Pharisees understood such as "scholar" or "intellectual" or "priest". Just a guy in a smock with a huge following. Just a guy who gave himself away to people.

So Jesus – seeing that this was a turning point – seeing that his death was immanent, tests the waters by asking, while strolling among the surrounding villages "who do people say that I am?" In other words: "What do they think is my identity?" And the amazing thing is that the disciples report all sorts of names: John, Elijah, one of the prophets..." So even though every Jew around is waiting for the Messiah to come from God, and even though this Jesus has just fed 30,000 people - no one – no one in town has named Jesus as that Messiah. Because they are looking for a warrior-king and not a guy who just hangs out with people.

Then comes the climax of the story: "But you (says the original Greek) you...who do you say that I am?" This is the moment of truth. And Peter, speaking for all of them says "You are the Messiah." In other words "you are the anointed one from God for whom we have all been waiting."

The Messiah² - the word from the lips of Peter would have sounded like "ha meshiah" – the messiah – the anointed one of the Lord is what the Aramaic word means. The Messiah – that is Jesus' identity and Jesus would be killed because of it -and he knew it. As this one word began to be passed – hushed - from person to person – being overheard by the Pharisees – it was like striking a match to a long dynamite fuse.

***

Sunday after Sunday, we have been hearing Mark's gospel - since May - and we are at the gospel's turning point. Between now and December, Mark's story careens to Jesus' death and resurrection. For Mark, Jesus is the messiah BECASE Jesus suffers and dies. Jesus' self-offering is Jesus' identity.

Jesus' self-offering is Jesus' identity.

People will be wondering what my identity is – this new, fat, bearded, opinionated priest- who is he? What is his identity? Well, it will unfold as time goes by – and it will even change. But I am here, like Amanda and Odie as your priest – as your friend- and all I can do is offer myself. This ministry – like the ministry of any priest is a ministry of being with you and walking along this path we call life.

I may not tell you all to "shut up" on my first Sunday – but I am sure I will do other really stupid stuff. But I am here and I am committed to loving you and being loved by you.

Together we are as Christ to each other. "Ha Meshiah" has come – the anointed one of the Lord has come and remains with us --- through us.

How are we like Christ? We are like Christ when we give ourselves away – to each other.

[1] Identity: 1570, from M.Fr. identité (14c.), from L.L. (5c.) identitatem (nom. identitas) "sameness," from ident-, comb. form of L. idem (neut.) "the same" (see identical); abstracted from identidem "over and over," from phrase idem et idem. Term identity crisis first recorded 1954.

[2] c.1300, Messias, from L.L. Messias, from Gk. Messias, from Aramaic meshiha and Heb. mashiah "anointed" (of the Lord), from mashah "anoint." This is the word rendered in Septuagint as Gk. Khristos (see Christ). In O.T. prophetic writing, it was used of an expected deliverer of the Jewish nation. The modern Eng. form represents an attempt to make the word look more Heb., and dates from the Geneva Bible (1560). Transf. sense of "an expected liberator or savior of a captive people" is attested from 1666.

Church of the Good Shepherd

September 03, 2010

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